working it out through a work out.

These days the stress is getting to me a lot. The everyday routine, the dead lines, the responsibilities, it’s just a mixture of no break and full hard work. One of the issues that has been consistent is my weight. After Batool my weight transported me into obesity, which is not at all normal for one pregnancy to take you from 53 kilos to 85kilos. And no one bothered to make sure I was healthy, in fact I was constantly told it was normal to become this fat. I was naive enough to believe, as it is Batool was a preemie and I totally forgot I was a human being in the process of taking care of her. It’s just recently say in the past 2 years that I’ve had time to look at myself in the mirror for more than 5 seconds. And I hate that I am still overweight and that losing weight is so bloody difficult. I’ve seen my cousins get to pre-baby weight by the first birthday of their child!

Anyway, recently I have been losing weight, I traced my way back to the days that I was of normal BMI, and tried to compare my past lifestyle to the one I am living now. And well, I realised I’ve been eating like I am pregnant, because I got habituated to eating larger quantities. I also don’t have as much exercise as I did then, and I don’t mean going to the gym, I mean climbing of stairs, running around the house, skating, cycling, playing table tennis and other sports. I have since the revelation decided to fill this void. Many young girls start to feel there’s a time in your life when you just don’t gain weight like when you’re in school or college but that’s rubbish. It’s not “the time” it’s how active you were. After marriage most women don’t have 2 or 3 floors of stairs to climb to classes, or sports period, or visits to the parks with parents. It’s a lifestyle issue not time. We can find endless excuses, we can live in denial but always unhappy, the jiggling fat reminding us of the person we have lost.

Anyway point being, I have finally started to make a change, and right now this is the exercise I am doing at home.

I’m not putting pressure on myself, cos the aim isn’t weight loss, it’s a lifestyle change.So the slow I am to more committed I will be after I eventually reach my target weight. I am presently 67kgs, and my end aim is 55kgs. I don’t want to be at the border of Normal-Overweight BMI, I want to be safe, I want to be able to eat candy, eat them lovely chocolate cakes and not be worried. I am not a film-star, the only expectation I have with me is a realistic one. I want to have energy and stamina to be able to play with Batool. I am only 25, I don’t need to feel  50.

Here are few thoughts that motivate me:

1. You won’t have issues looking for your size in clothing

2. You will feel younger and stronger emotionally

3. No more jiggling!

4. Just do whatever you can, whatever you can

5. It’s your body, no one can help you but yourself

6. Women across the globe have children, blaming the child for bad health choices is unfair

7. My daughter deserves a healthy mom

8. I deserve to be confident and happy

9. I will get better sleep at night

I also try to focus on the people who haven’t seen me for a long time to get proper feedback. Like mom, she travels to Hyderabad with a few months gap, if I can work enough to show ANY difference which is visually noticeable than it’s good enough. Also, the appreciation element makes you feel proud, after all exercising is hard work.

What motivates or demotivates you from being healthy?


The morning mystery

An adult needs 7 to 8 hours of sleep at night. Moms get a fraction of it, and in my case no mater how many hours of sleep I get it’s poor quality. I realised that recently.

I was under the impression that I was lacking energy and always felt my body needing more sleep regardless of how many hours I slept. When I went to Chennai for my exams without my daughter I slept for the first time in 3 years. I revisited sleep, no interruption sleep, stress free sleep. No one asking for water or milk every few hours, no cries in the middle of the night, nothing. Just pure sleep.

That’s changed everything for me. I realised it wasn’t me, it was the environment that was making it impossible for me to sleep. My daughter (3.5yrs) tends to drink water all night, and gets up for milk, asks if she can come on the bed with the hubby and me. All that jazz takes place the whole night, the drill gets me tired and exhausted by the time it’s morning. Also when it’s almost near wake up time, my mind starts to race with hopelessness.

Anyway I’m working on changing that. I am going to get Chennai esque sleep in Hyderabad 😉

Here are some of the measures I am taking as of now:

1. Strict rules on no waking up for water (so far it’s worked)

2. No entertainment for me (on the tablet) after midnight. I used to stay up till at-least 1:30am

3. No candy for me at night (working on that, it’s difficult)

4. No thinking about “how much” work has to be done the next morning. Instead telling myself “you have many hours of good sleep”

5. Phone strictly on silent NOT vibrate (This has changed life completely, the whatsapp vibration alerts used to wake me up)

So far that’s what I’m working on in terms of getting my sleep right, and I must say it has been working. However I find myself incredibly stressed past morning prayer, my mind moves into negative mode with “only 2 hours to sleep”. I am going to start working on positive thinking now. Even though my body is well happy and Ive gotten plenty rest, the negative thought makes me crave more sleep when I don’t necessary need it!

Another thing on my agenda is make sure I at-least take out 15 mins of quiet relaxed time for myself in the morning instead of rushing with all the chores.

Moms, now it’s your turn to share your morning blues and how you overcome them…leave comments below and share the love .