Do not expect…But why?

There’s an advice that goes around and a lot of people like it. Some things sound great on face value, they may be like the ultimate solutions to all your existing and non existent problems, but in this particular advice I beg to differ, BIG TIME.

I have been told this, I have heard other people say it to others, and It made sense to me too for a very little while. Do not expect!, then you won’t be disappointed. Well, here’s what I say, do not have unrealistic expectations, but for SURE keep expectations from people. It is important for us to do that so that we understand that we are supposed to not live a selfish life.

I keep expectations from myself, my colleagues, my friends, family everyone. Because we as human beings are required to live in harmony with each other. If we keep no expectations, we give full power to people to do whatever they want, we don’t bind them by love or acceptance. I have little to no expectations from strangers, but people that are significant to me are not strangers, and shouldn’t have to live like they can not care about me or what I feel I deserve from them.

It’s wrong to let people live without expectations on them, it’s wrong for us too, only when we keep expectations do we strive at any relationship. You just have to have the clarity between realistic and unrealistic expectations, because in the end it’s about pushing ourselves and others to become better people, the best versions of ourselves. And what’s better? When you expect, and that person breaks your trust and expectations, you know they’re not right for you, and that they don’t deserve your dedication. As opposed to the people with whom you are choosing to be a pushover, because you didn’t direct them or inform them of your expectations.

“Do not expect, you won’t be disappointed”, is like saying “don’t write the exam, you won’t fail!”

So here’s to anyone who tells you don’t expect! let’s be practical, it’s not an advice, it’s a recipe for doormat disaster.

Birthday fun!

I have been facing some courage issues with taking the daughter out. It’s very draining for me becaCAM02139use she wants to always be with me, she wants me to be beside at all times, and just wont actively participate with children. But I gathered all courage in my movement of being free from the shackles of false perception. Been feeling very positive since leaving FB. So I ordered gifts online, a book ( this is a must), and a game (you see, variety is the spice of life 😉 )

I shall leave you with pics….I kind of coordinated with the daughter on colour, but just an hour into the party a kid spilled sprite on her…Oops! Aren’t I glad I carried an extra frock! Motherhood!

CAM02137 Enjoying!!

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The party was great we were there till half past 11 in the night. The children enjoyed, Batool eventually started to participate, and received a gift too. There were party favours, a yummy cake, great hosts and a lot of socialising. God knows I needed it. The bday made my weekend very hectic. Friday was school day, and Sat was the PTM has]d to counsel parents/students, and then Sat was the bday, came home and made preparation for the Sunday school, and Sunday I skipped my madrasa and went for a workshop at Roshni on School mental health.

What have you been upto? Any tips of making the children mingle more?

Judy Blume books recommended for adolescent girls

I remember being in 8th grade and reading these books up cover to cover, and then again. They were my girlie getaway, I grew up with two brothers and wasn’t exposed to enough girlie drama. My friends too are far away from girlie, and I am still working on that part of me.

 

Image courtesy imisstheoldschool

The books by Judy Blume that especially are written for the adolescent girls are a real fun way of exposing them to growing issues of puberty, siblings, friend problems, family problems, enjoying and understanding life etc. They are written beautifully, in a first person format which made reading the book very easy. My favourites were ‘Just as long and we’re together’ and it’s continued part  ‘Here’s to you Rachael Robinson’.

I must admit I haven’t read a tonne of books in my life, I have always liked books that were as close to reality as possible, without being boring. But I have found that reading books has given me a lot of new perspective on life, and I know for a fact that there’s plenty entertainment and lessons that can be gotten from a few pages of a good written book. I have raved about the importance of reading in a previous blog post and will always stand by the experience of reading a book.

I recommend these to all the girls at the school, it feels nice to be an enabler of exposure. Most of these books are available at flipkart, I have added all of them to my wishlist, and ordered one too. Can’t wait for it to arrive, reading these books after so many years is always a great experience. I highly recommend moms of girls to give these books a shot, read them first if you like, they shall amuse you too.

Will do more fun posts on books and recommendations.

Till then happy reading